If you haven’t seen What to Expect When you’re Expecting, you need to.
Let’s just get right to the point. I think we put an immense amount of pressure on new and more importantly, first time moms to breast feed. I remember when I was pregnant reading articles, Facebook posts, and comments left by other moms straight up shaming women who didn’t breast feed their kids.
Ya’ll. I can’t.
Breastfeeding is hard. Like really, freaking hard. I honestly don’t think there’s any way a woman can mentally prepare for all that. It’s just so much.
I was lucky enough to breast feed Em for six months. Now, let me give you all the facts. Home girl could eat. Around a month we started to give her formula at night, which I’m not even ashamed to admit made her sleep longer, which was the point. I exclusively breast fed her, no pumping for about four months. And I’ll be even more honest here and say I didn’t love it.
After four months, I started doing every other feeding with formula and finally started pumping. Why I didn’t pump as much before, I’m not sure. Maybe some where I honestly thought that it really was just “Breast is Best”.
I was tired. And also hungry all the time.
I had made the goal before Em was born to make it six months so it was really important to me to keep that. And I did. But leading up to it, I just knew she was done. It was that motherly intuition kicking in again.
I’m more than happy to relay to you that I have a happy and very healthy one year old right now. Formula and all.
I wish I could ban all those mean moms from the Internet. You know, the one’s that think you need to birth your kids at home and that breast feeding is the only way they can survive. They’re the kind that nurse their kids until their old enough to ask for it. Which I’m also not ashamed to say I think is weird.
I’m done with the idea that you’re not a true mother unless you have that bond with your baby.
False. You’re a mother the first time you hold that bundle of joy. Whether you birthed them at home, at a hospital, in the backseat of a car, or you didn’t even birth them yourself. You are a mother.
So you know best.
Which means if feeding your baby formula is what’s best, than do that.
I’m not ashamed to admit that while I loved (and at times miss) that first nursing session with my girl in the morning, I do not miss trying to cover myself up and do it at dinner. I do not miss trying to figure out where the next stop would be so I could climb in the back and nurse her. I’m not ashamed to admit that I didn’t totally over the moon love breast feeding.
Also not ashamed to admit that I’m mad I didn’t keep going just to loose the baby weight. Don’t judge me. You know what I’m talking about.
I have bonded with Emily far more doing other things than breast feeding.
There I said it.
Now here me here. For those of you mamas who can breast feed to that year mark, I am applauding you! As long as you aren’t the mean kind 😉
But I just think we all need to come together and support each other on this. Whether we do it or we don’t. Whether we choose to…or we don’t. Whatever the choice is that you’re making for your baby is the best.
Fed is best.